Crazy Little Thing Called Love
Pentecost 8 July 14, 2013 Luke 10:25…
One day, just after I was born – almost 50
years ago, my grandfather was walking home from work. He was a butcher and he lived in Melbourne
Australia. He had a heart attack out on
the street – but this was in the day before cell phones and 911 – and he fell
onto the sidewalk clutching his chest. The people around him did nothing – they
either did not know what was happening, or did not care what was
happening. It was the same day that JFK
was shot so maybe they were all pre-occupied with what was happening in Texas –
but never the less my grandfather fell onto the sidewalk and there he lay for a
long time as the people in the streets walked around him to continue on with
their business. My grandfather died that
day. I don`t know who found him or
helped him, but someone must have because my grandpa died at home and my father
and grandmother were with him. Somewhere
on the streets of Melbourne that day there was a stranger loved his neighbour
and my grandpa was able to die surrounded by love.
The
disciples and Jesus are in the midst of a loving moment right now, they have
just returned from being sent out and it has been a successful mission. They were well received, people were healed,
peace was passed and the disciples are joyous on their return. But in the midst of the celebration they are
interrupted by a lawyer who stands up to test Jesus. “Teacher,” he said, “what
must I do to inherit eternal life?” 26He said to him, “What is
written in the law? What do you read there?” 27He answered, “You
shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and
with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself.”
28And he said to him, “You have given the right answer; do this, and
you will live.” 29But then he asked …Jesus, “And who is my
neighbor?”
My neighbours in Lac Magentic have been
suffering this past week. I have been
following the crisis on the news, and by
Wednesday it seemed to have reached a crescendo –that was when Ed Burkhardt the
chairman of the Montreal, Maine and Atlantic Railway line went to LacMagentic
to speak to the townspeople. He was inundated
by reporters – and until the police finally escorted him away – there was a
very painful 45 minutes where he seemed unable to say anything right. Oh he used words like`` sorry`` and ``wish it
had never happened`` and he shared that
he too felt awful – but he also laid blame, and suggested that the train’s
engineer was responsible for the crash.
I think in his heart he was trying to be a neighbor to the to the people
of Lac Magentic – but what he ended up being for the people was a blundering,
blaming big businessman – he would have been better off to have stayed at home
and keeping quiet. He may have thought
that what he was trying to do was considerate and loving but it wasn`t.
Because blaming is not loving nor is it
being a neighbor – and being insensitive to the high emotions of the people in
the midst of a terrible crisis is not a loving action either. It felt like his foray into Lac Megentic was
his personal quest for absolution, so that Ed Burkhardt could let go of the
guilt and shame of what his trains did.
And it appears that the people of Lac Magentic were able to sniff out
his fear his shame, and his lack of empathy.
Loving our neighbour should be simple thing,
but it is not. Loving is not easy,
whether we are loving ourselves, our families, or complete strangers – loving
is complicated – and messy. I also
realize that when I use the word love, I am speaking of an emotion that we all
feel in one way or another and have all experienced differently from each
other, and so there is a certain amount of ambiguity when you use the word
love.
“Brene Brown in her book called the The
Gifts of Imperfection: speaks of love as though it is an absolute necessity
for all human beings to have in order to exist, and she writes:
“A deep sense of love and belonging is an
irreducible need of all woman, men and children. We are biologically, cognitively, physically,
and spiritually wired to love, to be loved and to belong. When those needs are not met, we don’t
function as we were meant to. We break. We fall apart. We numb.
We ache. We hurt others. We get sick….
“Love:
We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable selves to be deeply
seen and known, and when we honour the spiritual connection that grows from
that offering with trust, respect, kindness and affection.
Love is not something we give or get: it is something that we nurture and grow, a
connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within
each of them – we can only love others as much as we love ourselves.`` Pg 26
And Jesus says “You shall love
the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all
your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself.”
So how do I love my neighbour
And Jesus told a story about a man who was
beaten up and left for dead on the side of a road, and as he lay there
suffering a priest walked by – and for reasons that probably made a lot of
sense to the priest – stuff about cleanliness and purity – stuff about proper
and right – he walked around the beaten man and continued on his way – and next
– a Levite – and he too for reasons not given, but I am sure made perfect sense
to him – choose to walk on and leave the man for dead. The next to come was a Samaritan – and he
made a different choice – he had compassion on the beaten man and bandaged him,
and treated his wounds, took him to a safe place, and made sure that he the
resources he needed to heal – and then made a further commitment to return and
cover all of the costs.
And Jesus asks: Which of these three,
do you think, was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of the
robbers?” 37He said, “The one who showed him mercy.” Jesus said to
him, “Go and do likewise.”
But what if I am afraid of my neighbor
because sometimes my neighbour is scary
A few years ago I was on a trip with the
Algoma presbytery youth – one of which was my eldest son Rhys. We were travelling to London from the Sault –
we stopped just north of Toronto at the McDonalds at the highway way station –
there was a lot of laughing and joking and pushing each other around. We had been on the bus for a few hours at
this point. As we were standing in line waiting for food. There was a man who was ahead of our group
and with the jostling, I accidentally trod on his toes – I apologized
immediately and he was gracious in his response, letting me know that it was
not a big deal and told me not to worry about it. A couple of minutes later –
the jostling continued and this time it was my 16 year old son that bumped the
man – this time he spun round grabbed my son by his collar and threatened to
punch him – my son’s disarming charm and Rhys holding up his hands and not
threatening him back the man decided to release him and went to order his big
Mac – I stood there stunned – and not a little afraid – and confused about the
abrupt change in this man – it took me a while to realize that the man was
afraid of my teenage boy so he assumed he was being attached and needed to
defend himself from this group of threatening bully boys instead of a careless
accident by some thoughtless teenagers.
He saw my son as a threat not as a neighbour.
So how do I love my neighbour when
Sometimes my neighbour has a different
culture, and I do not understand their language or their customs, or why they
make the choices they do.
And sometimes my neighbour has a different
sexual preference than me and
sometimes my neighbour has no shoes and
dirty fingernails and bad breath, and no home,
and sometime my neighbour is morbidly obese,
or mentally ill, or developmentally delayed or old or young or first nations or
asian or arab.
Sometimes my neighbour looks and sounds like
me but has hurt me or treated me badly.
Sometimes my neighbour is my brother or my
sister or my son or daughter that I haven`t spoken to in three years.
And sometimes my neighbour is me – and I
have shame and guilt about something I did in my past.
It is not easy, in fact sometimes it is
really, really hard to love our neighbour – a few years ago I was visiting my
son Rhys in Vancouver with Elizabeth, who was 8 months old. It was the end of the visit and I was driving
back to the airport in a rented car on my own.
Rhys gave me instructions which I did not follow – something I do quite
frequently – and I found myself not on the way to the airport but instead I had
driven into downtown Vancouver – most of you are aware of the reputation of
Downtown Vancouver – I was aware of the reputation, I was going in the wrong
direction and I had a deadline of a plane to catch – I was panicked – I need to
turn around – so I did and as I started heading north again, back from where I
came from, I notice a woman in the middle of the street, crying and yelling and
trying to get away from a man who was threatening her. I knew what was going on, I knew it was bad, I
knew that I needed to do something to help this poor woman - but my fear made
me drive away without doing anything at all– I am still haunted by the look of
fear on that woman’s. I did not love my
neighbour that day – but I did make it to the airport on time.
So, what Ed Burkhardt could have done
differently at Lac Magentic to love his neighbours this past Wednesday, was to
allow his vulnerable self to be seen and known. He needed to address the pain,
the sorrow, the shock, and the grief of the people – He needed to love them in
this time instead of seeking to free himself of blame and shame. If he had been able to apologize like he
meant it, take responsibility for his – and the mistakes of the company he
heads, and maybe offer some aid, he would have been received differently. If he could have opened his arms and his
heart and be empathetic – feel their pain and sorrow without being defensive
that would have gone a long way to help the people. And if all that was too hard, – He could have
just been there, talking to the people one on one, and not making it an press
opportunity, bearing witness to the
sorrow and shock and grief and pain and anger and all the emotions that people
feel in times such as these –bearing witness is a loving action.
So what does it look like – this love, this
love of self, this love of neighbor, and how do we love like that…
To love like that means to act with kindness
instead of callousness
And patience instead of rudeness
Loving like that means that often humility is
the better choice instead of boastfulness
And Tolerance instead of intolerance, respect
instead of disrespect
Try open mindedness instead of judgment, and
understanding instead of fear
Forgiveness is always the better path instead
of revenge and instead of resentment and instead of malice, and leave the
retribution to God.
Try to Love instead of hate or instead of
apathy or instead of emptiness
“You shall love the Lord your God
with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and
with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself.”
Even though that woman`s face still haunts me, I know that every day I
have many more opportunities to love my neighbour. Sometimes it is as simple as sharing a smile
or a kind word. Other times it requires
more effort – and sometimes it loving my neighbour is very very hard. But no matter what, I know and you know that
each and every time we encounter another human being it is our opportunity -
our chance to put this into action and love our neighbour, to care for our
neighbour, to show kindness to our neighbour.
Thanks be to God for this opportunity.
Amen
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